1. First Tomb Raider photos reveal no tombs. Sorry
Although it’s early days, with its release coming in March 2018, Warner Bros. has uploaded a few images of that infamous raider of tombs, Lara Croft. The three photos aren’t much to go on, but that’s not to say we can’t ask a number of unanswered questions. Who is Lara branding a rather crappy spear at on the beach? Where did she get that second belt?
Along with the photos, Warners have outlined Lara’s backstory. It’s fairly familiar stuff – 21-year-old daughter of vanished adventurer leaves everything behind and goes looking for her father – but not especially comprehensive. Will writer Geneva Robertson-Dworet follow the video game source material, and have Lara repeatedly fall to her death after failing a jump? Will she repeatedly drown about halfway through? We’ve just got the year to wait.
2. Dirty Rotten Scoundrels remake gets a dirty rotten director
OK, that’s probably not especially fair to Chris Addison – aka the shittest James Bond ever, aka David Niven – but he’s got a big Hollywood film to direct. He won’t mind. Variety reports that the Thick of It and Veep writer-director-actor will direct Jac Schaeffer’s gender-swapped remake of 1988’s Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, titled Nasty Women. Anne Hathaway, who’s already starring in one gender-swapped remake over in Ocean’s 8, will divvy up the title roles with Rebel Wilson. Plotwise, Nasty Women will be updated to the modern day and see two scam artists using their feminine wiles to try and swindle a tech wunderkind out of his fortune. Sounds like a lark.
3. Anybody call for a web slinger?
Spider-Man, as we know, does whatever a spider can. In the first proper trailer for Spider-Man: Homecoming that extends to crashing a pool party, regular quippery and pissing off Iron Man. Over 160 seconds we’re also introduced to Michael Keaton’s villainous villain, the Vulture, and see what kind of role Robert Downey Jr.’s Tony Stark will play. Regarding the latter, the general impression is disappointed parent. Regarding the former, weird uncle. Homecoming will be released in the UK on July 7.
4. Paul Greengrass will bring knife, gun, shaky cam to Eliot Ness biopic
Despite the fact that Brian De Palma’s 1987 take on the Eliot Ness legend is considered by many to be Untouchable, that hasn’t stopped Paul Greengrass eyeing the story for a new biopic. According to Deadline, Greengrass is circling Ness, an adaptation of the graphic novel Torso that has been penned by L.A. Confidential writer Brian Helgeland. Apparently Paramount Pictures see the story as the start of a potential franchise, despite the fact that Ness’ life gets gradually more depressing after he helped put Capone away. The studio is in need of a few more bonafide franchises – with Transformers sputtering on, Tom Cruise slowly aging out of Mission: Impossible, and Terminator recently being shuttered – so what the hey. Production is due to begin this autumn. No one has yet been cast, but considering Ness wasn’t even 30 when Capone was arrested, this is probably a role too far for Greengrass favourite Matt Damon. Capone, on the other hand…
5. Batter up! Joss Whedon is (probably) making Batgirl
It’s looking like Joss Whedon is going to bring us a standalone Batgirl pic. That’s a bit of a surprise. Variety reports that the writer-director, having already made two Avengers films for Marvel, is all ready to switch sides to DC. The trade is careful to note that nothing has yet been signed, but Whedon would be expected to write, direct and produce the film as part of the DC Extended Universe. While the film would be a standalone affair, other characters from Gotham City will probably pop by to say howdy or break the law. So, who could play the titular crimefighter, currently being played by Rosario Dawson over in the LEGO Batman universe? Maybe we need a Casting Call.
6. Luc Besson’s new film sure looks like a Luc Besson film
“Agents Valerian and Laureline: you have less than ten hours to find the threat and eliminate it.” So says Clive Owen less than 90 seconds into the latest trailer for Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets. That’s how high the stakes are. Demonstrating that Valerian isn’t just a series of wacky desktop wallpapers, the first trailer for Luc Besson’s adaptation of the iconic graphic novel is packed full of exposition to help get us grounded. There’s a city under attack, an unknown force, and an attack only Valerian (Dane DeHaan) and Laureline (Cara Delevingne) can stop. Hopefully within ten hours. Also starring Ethan Hawke, John Goodman and Rihanna, Valerian flies into UK cinemas on August 4.
7. Aaron Sorkin might get in on this superhero thing
Deciding that what the superhero game needs is some hardcore hallway-based walk and talk, Aaron Sorkin is taking meetings with Marvel and DC. The Social Network and Moneyball writer was on the red carpet in Las Vegas this week to promote his directorial debut, Molly’s Game, when he admitted that he may dip his toes into the world of capes and cowls. According to Sorkin, “I happen to have meetings coming up with both DC and Marvel… I have to go into these meetings and tell them as respectfully as I can that I’ve never read a comic book.”
To the superhero players that be, we say why not play to Sorkin’s strengths? Give him a hero with political powers. Superman, Wonder Woman, Captain America and Thor have all become President of the United States in various comics, making a mockery of the natural-born citizen clause. Any of those could make for a fertile four seasons of television. Alternatively, should Sorkin sets his sights lower, Tony Stark had to make do with Secretary of Defense. [via Comicbook.com]
8. Break the internet, Ralph
The studio panels at CinemaCon usually last a while. According to Deadline, there are generally some famous faces, a few clips from various tentpoles and a whole lot of rambling about new cinematic experiences. This year however, Disney’s presentation was over in 13 minutes. It’s not that the studio is out of ideas (Cars 3 is coming July 14 after all), but rather that they wanted to play Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales in its entirety. Hmm. There was one bit of news to catch our interest though. The sequel to Wreck-It Ralph, due out March 9 next year, now has a title. Ralph Breaks The Internet: Wreck-It Ralph 2 will presumably see John C. Reilly’s protagonist damage the world wide web (thank you, synonyms) before no doubt attempting to put right the problem alongside a lovable cast of kooky characters.
Next year, he's gonna break it ?. Ralph Breaks the Internet: Wreck-It Ralph 2 opens in theatres on March 9, 2018. pic.twitter.com/u1qQn7TUUI
— Disney Animation (@DisneyAnimation) March 29, 2017